Listening

For my entire life, I've always been discouraged from sharing my feelings with other people. I've always been the person that other people came and talked to about how they were feeling and what's going on in their life.  I've been hurt a lot. I've always had that "Don't share how you feel" mentality with the people who come and talk to me. I always feel like I have to stay strong for them. Someone has to. (I have to keep reminding myself that's God's job… :))

I am a very emotional person but most people wouldn't know. Sometimes I bottle it up inside for so long it goes from one extreme to the other. I will start crying or get really upset over little things. I cover up what I really feel about things that are said to me with sarcasm or I'll crack a joke and make fun of myself for it. Particularly when people say, "Hey, you're really bad at that..." , I will make a sarcastic comment about myself  or them but that doesn't make it hurt any less. Recently, God has been helping me open up to people about what I'm feeling...not the annoying, whiny "OH MY LIFE IS SOO HARD WAHHHHAHAHAHAH!!" kind of sharing my feelings...just like, "Hey, when you said this or did this...that hurt...or that was really mean…" or just confronting and challenge people I'm close to about things that I've noticed about them.  This is a really, really difficult thing for me beyond what anyone else will ever know. There is no shame in having emotions and being open about them. God created us in HIS image. That means He has emotions too.

But honestly, the way people receive confrontation is the difficult part. People don't like to be confronted (No, neither do I.)...but we have to put ourselves in that other person's shoes and realize that they too have feelings. It's not just about us, it's not just about them. We're all in this together.  (No nasty High School Musical reference intended).

Please don't shut people out when they try to talk to you about stuff. They could be falling off the edge and you may be the only person that will take the time to listen. It can make a huge difference. Repaint Jesus for that person. I've been in that persons' shoes. It's the worst to be shut out...especially by your fellow Christians. Let's all make a change and listen.

Challenge: Sit down with someone over coffee  and learn their story. Don't make it about you...ask them questions about what you've learned about them. Listen intently. It's a really good exercise to learn how to listen and get to know people.