Monday, March 28, 2011

I AM NOT HOMESCHOOLED!!

Okay, so what if I'm a little bit awkward? Well, really awkward. It's hard for me to open up to people. I'm really shy. That was not a result of my homeschooling. In fact I went to public school but according to most of the world, I fit the stereotype of a homeschooler. I prefer to read essays by Ralph Waldo Emerson rather than the latest Twilight book. I research conspiracy theories for absolutely no reason but my own entertainment. I think Shakespeare was a genius. I have strong political views. I am in love with Emily Dickinson's poetry and will analyze it all day if I can. I think intelligence is one of the most attractive qualities. I would live in a bookstore if I could. I love corny jokes, telling them and laughing at them. I think a lot of things nobody thinks are funny are hilarious. I am sometimes quiet and extremely laid back. I try to treat everybody with respect. I always hold the door open for people. I am a firm believer in modesty. I don't know what the most popular movies, music or whatever are. Quite frankly, I don't care.

But guess what? Stereotypes are stupid. It's great to feel like you belong to something but it's even greater to be accepted for who you are and not have someone label you as who they expect you to be. So here I am, writing this as Emily...not a "homeschooler", a "public schooler", an "unofficial homeschooler", a "nerd", an "outcast" a "prep"...none of those things are me. I am Emily, exactly who God created me to be.

Friday, March 25, 2011

Smooth Talker

Sometimes when I was a young teenager, I  would read the dictionary for my own amusement. There is nothing particularly interesting about the dictionary as a whole but I am fascinated with words, how to use them and what they mean. It satisfies me to string words together on a piece of paper and create something beautiful. I love the process of trial and error looking for different words and arranging them until they sound just right. There is just something about writing that makes me feel like I have complete freedom to express whatever is on my mind, not having to hold back. 
However, talking is a different story. I sometimes stumble over my words and say things that don't make any sense. Sometimes I don't think before I speak. It is much easier realized that words can cut people down after speaking them rather than just writing them down and crossing them off. It is easier to uplift somebody in an anonymous note than it is to muster up the courage to approach that person. It is easier to give words from God to people in writing than it is in speech but then you don't get to see peoples' reactions to what God has to say to them.
...If only I could apply the same process to talking as I do to writing, I would be a smooth talker.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Repainting Jesus


Over the last couple of days, I have been really been reflecting on the message in this video that Eric Samuel Timm portrays. Who knew that these two words would have such an effect on me? Repainting Jesus. No, not changing who Jesus is but repainting the image that people have of Him due to people within the church. Telling them God hates them, that they're an abomination...that they're going to hell.  How can I, as a Christian who has a heart for broken people, be different? How can I apply this concept in my walk with God and reaching out to people of repainting Jesus to show who He really is? One main concept that I want to apply in reaching out to people is that love is not conditional.

What about you? What concepts will you use to "repaint Jesus" to others in your own life?

Monday, March 14, 2011

Conviction

What is sin to one person may not be to another. I have realized this over and over again as I have saturated myself in a Christian environment that I normally don't get when I'm at home with my family, I tend to gravitate toward the people in my college ministry group and spend a ridiculous amount of time with them. What I choose to abstain from, what they choose to abstain from...what isn't clearly stated in scripture (ie adultery, stealing, lying) is based on conviction. Sure, sometimes we mess up but that's where forgiveness comes in...but where do we draw the line in what is sin and what isn't? The answer is the Holy Spirit but other than that, I honestly don't know for sure but I have a general idea. I do realize everyone's different. For me personally, I think that if you're not sure about something, don't do it. Sometimes I like to question things though. Many others do too and if you're one of those people and still don't know, consider these questions:
1. Why are you doing it?
2. How does it benefit you?
3. How is it affecting you spiritually?
4. Can it be considered a stumbling block for people around you?
5. Is it something you did pre-salvation? If it is, how did it affect you then?
6. Would I still do this if God was sitting across from me and I could physically see Him?

What do you guys think? Do you have anything to add? Any thoughts?

Friday, March 11, 2011

Stuff [Most] Christian Girls Think About (Collaboration with Jamie)

JAMIE'S BLOG THAT WE WROTE

[Disclaimer: Most of this is just a joke. Don't get mad, get glad!]
1. I'm dating Jesus until someone who looks more like -insert celebrity name- comes along.
2. If he's on the worship team, he has to be well dressed.
3. He asked me out so we're definitely getting married tomorrow.
4. It doesn't matter if you're good looking, playing the acoustic guitar puts you at an advantage.
5. He raised both hands up in worship, I LOVE HIM.
6. I have to get married by age 19 or I'm gonna become a cat lady.
7. Modest is hottest
8. I can listen to Ke$ha because she has Jesus on her necklace.
9. Hardcore Christian boys have gauges in their ears, wear skinny jeans and flannel.
10. I'm going to Bible college for [insert major here] with an emphasis on my MRS degree.
11. -shifty eyes-
12. You must have to have your wedding planned by age 11 or you're doomed to celibacy.
13. Kids must have biblical names in order to prosper.
14. God told me to marry you but He only told one of us, I don't understand.
15. It's an unwritten commandment, "A woman shalt not pursue a man. Men, man up."
16. Bromance makes us jealous.
17. You beer drinking, chain-smoking hipsters!!
18. -shifty eyes-
19. Background checks are a must: Facebook, Twitter, Youtube, Google
20. "We're not stalkers, we're thorough."
21. St. Arbucks is actually a saint. Coffee almost as good as holy water...almost...
22. No matter what they try to indoctrinate us with, Christian side hugs are still stupid. (Jamie loves them)
23. Despite what guys think, facial hair does not make you a man!
24. The Jonas Brothers are Christians [swoon]
25. Checking out guys is okay as long as you give Jesus the credit.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

"Um..my family isn't Christian. I'm the only one." "What about your parents?" Parent. One. Singular. "Where's your dad?" Somewhere in Florida, I don't know.... "Oh, she had a child at a young age...that kid is going to have a kid at a young age...and the cycle is just going to continue." "People who don't have money are lazy." "Everyone was telling me that I should get an abortion and I should have listened to them. You're lucky I went through with my pregnancy." "You don't have a boyfriend...you must like girls." "You're beautiful...on the inside."
****I truly hope this doesn't sound like complaining because that is definitely not what I intend to do. My intentions are to show people that they need to be careful what they say because it can stick with someone for a long time. If you would like any of these sentences explained, I will be more than willing to explain if you ask. I just don't want this blog to be longer than anyone's attention span.****

These are all things that I have responded to over and over to people or things that people have said to me/about others that have really hurt me. Most of this was not recent but have stuck with me. I don't know if people realize that the words they say, even out of anger, have power over people. I don't know if people realize that they shouldn't assume things just because people don't meet their typical expectations. Not everybody is a conventional, run of the mill, got saved when they were 4, Godly parents, grew up in church all of their life Christian. We have to realize that everyone comes from a different environment, a different background, has different aspiration and goals than everyone else. Some people have had things handed over to them. Others have learned from hardship. Others have learned from other peoples' mistakes.

I chose to follow God on my own, without any parental influence. I know my mom loves me but she could probably care less whether or not I go to church. At first, I believed in God, I went to church...but I was taught that there is nothing more to God than the initial salvation encounter. Maybe they taught something else but that's what I thought. You get saved and that's it, you can do whatever you want. I had friends that told me there was something more worth living for. But there was nothing more, why should I believe them? God was just somebody we sang hymns to and read about in the King James Bible...we followed a set of rules...some people, the rules were more enforced on than others. I started to believe my friends that told me there was something more and went to their church with them. I thought it was a cult at first. (I still go to that church when I'm home, 7 years later.) I kept going back. I didn't know why, but I kept going back. I eventually got into it...then something happened one day, so I tried to run away. I don't remember what it was but I remember that it happened. I decided that I would just go to church and go through the motions but not put my heart into it. That was my way of running away without anyone questioning me. My friend handed me a letter a couple of days later, the first line: "I AM MORE THAN JUST CHURCH." I knew what I was getting into was real after that. I never tried to run away again.

But truly, people have hurt me even in the church. I go to a private Christian college. We're all at different places in our walk with God but sometimes people just assume little things like I have two parents. Sometimes it hurts. I wish people wouldn't just assume before getting to know people. I wish they wouldn't just say things without thinking that maybe, just maybe it might hurt the other person.

Monday, March 7, 2011

My Converse hardly warm my ice cold feet
as I walk down the road to a peculiar place.
I long for the familiarity of things that
once were but will never be the same.

I breathe in the beauty of my surroundings
and I learn the things that are valuable
don't always lie in the destination but
are hidden within the journey.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Some things that I have learned in my short 20 years of life...

1. Besides God, Love and unity should be the foundation of our faith.

2. Nobody's perfect...not even Drake Bell.

3. The only place cockiness will get you is punched in the face or people wishing that they could punch you in the face.

4. You have two choices when you make a mistake: you can dwell on your mistake and let it drive you crazy or you can learn from it.

5. You can't change the past, but you can change the present and you can change the future.
6. Anything worth doing takes effort.

7. It's okay to look ridiculous sometimes...you miss out on a lot of fun if you are always concerned with what others think of you. And when everyone else is doing something and you stand off to the side because they look ridiculous, you're the one that looks ridiculous.

8. There is always somebody who is less fortunate than you. Don't focus on what you don't have, focus on what you have been blessed with. Likewise, it is okay to have nice things. Don't feel guilty about it. However, don't buy it if you can't afford it.

9. Appreciate your family..friends will come and go but your family will always be there. Love them with unconditional love because you never know when they will be gone.

10. Michael Jackson was a musical genius, despite his reputation.

11. It's cool to see the gifts that God gave others. It's not cool to let the gifts that God gave you remain stagnant.

12. It is perfectly okay to listen to screamo music really loudly but turn it down when other people who don't like it are in the room.

13. Comparing yourself to others is probably one of the worst things that you can do. You're best at being yourself.

14. It is valuable to study your Bible rather than just read it...learn about the cultural context...learn about who wrote what...learn about the different characters in the Bible...realize that God's word is infallible.

15. It's okay to have lazy days sometimes but not all the time.

16. Pilates is a sport. You don't believe me? Try doing it and tell me how you feel in two days.

17. Being super critical of everyone else is not going to make you friends, at least not true friends.

18. There is so much revelation and wisdom found in children's books. Examples: "You Are Special"- Max Lucado and "Oh the Places You'll Go!" by Dr. Seuss

19. It's really funny to mess with people that like to be in control of everything or like everything to be perfect.

20. It's difficult to write without inspiration. Difficult, but not impossible